I finally discovered the gif.
“Would you, could you dance on a man for money?”
I would not, could not dance on a man, on a chair, in a club, sit on his lap and start to rub, on a couch, in a booth or bed, do you think I’m crazy in my head?
Nala was a fashion girl. Or rather a fashion-blog-lover kind of girl.
Some colleagues you meet the first time once they hit the floor in their work costumes. Already in stripper persona you can only guess from their style what they’d be like in real life. A tramp can often be identified for the tramp she is in real life and the stylish stripper will most likely be even more stylish in daytime attire. Other times however one gets surprised, when the blonde, silicone enhanced barbie slut turns into a normal girl-next-door once the make up is removed and the 7-inch heels are changed for a pair of worn out sneakers.
Nala however I saw the first time as daytime girl when she rushed past me into the dressing-room. In a very cute and unpretentious way she looked like she had just sprung out of a street style fashion blog. She ticked every box on the how-to of being a cool hipster chick: the stringy blonde dip-dye hair, the black rivet boots, leggings and the loose washed out vintage shirt expressing an affiliation with some 60s rockband she’d probably never heard a song of. The obligatory green army parka was a little oversized and completed her très très cool et très très chic outfit.
“There’s too many men, Too many people making too many problems, and not much love to go round…” Phil Collins was doing his thing while on the main stage, I was doing mine. Some days I like to leave the music choice up to the DJ and enjoy the ironic awkwardness when I have to dance to a song that innocently reminds me of my ‘other life’ while I am sliding down a shiny pole in an obscenely hot pink g-string - the kind you can only purchase in the dressing room of a strip club. “This is the world we live in, ohhh - ohhh, and these are the hands were given, ohhh - ohh…” Nala was watching me from the back of the room and when I stood next to her, five minutes later, pulling my little silver dress back over my thong, she pointed to me that she wanted to tell me something. “Yes?” I smiled. “Sorry, but I have a question….can I ask you something?” she asked in the cutest french accent ever. “Qui, bien sur” I replied. One of the only five phrases I could say in french. “I am a bit embarrassed because you know I have small tits but I see you have small tits too and you dance really good and sexy and so I wanted to ask you…is it a problem?” she looked at me in this friendly and open way you rarely see from other dancers. She was obviously new to the game and I liked her. “You mean for stripping, for making money?”, I asked back. “Yes, for you, is it a problem? Because I am very shy to show because they are so small.” She touched her breasts that were pretty small indeed and smiled timidly while looking down on them. I melted away. That was exactly the kind of authenticity that could get her dollars and dollars of admiration. Or a dangerous load of insecurity if she wasn’t careful. “Don’t worry, its not a problem at all” I said. “You know, some guys like big tits and some guys like small tits. It is more important that you like yourself and express it. Men love that most of all.” She listened to me like an eager student. “And you know, it is good being shy about it. Just tell the guys like you told me and they will loooooove it!” She laughed and gave me a hug, “Thank you so muuuch!”
That day Nala was only 18 years old. Eighteen. She turned 19 two days later and wasn’t happy about it. “I want to stay young, like, forever!” She smiled excitedly as if there was actually a real chance of her wish coming true. Then she turned serious all of a sudden. “You know my mum, she starts having grey hair now…I don’t like it. It makes me….wrrrrr…..”. She hugged her little body and shivered like she was really cold or really scared or both. “Time always pass too quickly, you know. I don’t like!”
Oh Nala, you are too young to realize that. Happy Birthday little girl.